I’m singing in my head right now. I’m stoked about my plan for blogs in February of 2025. This is the first idea for a set of blog concepts I plan to publish in February.
Every Friday I plan to publish a blog related to LOVE! How exciting, right? I refer to February as “the love month” because of Valentine’s Day and because why not? What better way to celebrate “the love month” than to publish love related blogs!
I haven’t written them all out in their entirety yet, but I have brainstormed and the concept ideas are ready to go.
So, to start out this set of four LOVE blogs in February, I plan to discuss commercialized love.
I imagine most people have heard the main complaints related to Valentine’s Day.
“It’s too commercialized.”
“You shouldn’t only show your partner love on Valentine’s Day, it should happen every day.”
“You shouldn’t celebrate Valentine’s Day because society says you have to.”
Everyone is allowed to have their opinion. I’m not here to make you feel any type of way if these are things you say.
I’m simply going to look at these statements from the perspective of how I’ve experienced Valentine’s Day.
Every year, as a kid, I would wake up to a small stuffed animal and a box of conversation hearts. My mom would sneak in our rooms at night and leave them somewhere in the room for my brother and I to find.
Later on in the day there would be a knock on our home door. My grandpa would be standing there with two red roses, to give my mom and I. They were either fake or made of chocolate. I can see my sweet grandpa’s face so vividly from those memories.
When I was 14, I had my first real boyfriend. I remember celebrating my first Valentine’s Day as someone’s girlfriend. I was so giddy because my mom and grandpa had always made the day special. I don’t remember what I got him, but I remember exactly what he got me. It was literally the cutest thing. I can’t remember the order he gave me the gifts, but I loved all three of them. One was a dragon statue. One was a giraffe statue with two giraffes. The last one was a heart locket/necklace.
How precious that a 14-year-old could be so perceptive. I loved dragons, I even had a pair of green dragon shoes around that time. Giraffes have been my favorite animal for as long as I can remember. I’m obsessed with lockets, but I don’t know if that started before or after I was gifted my first one at 14.
I still have the giraffe statue and the locket. I’m not sure what happened to my dragon statue, but the memory of it is perfectly preserved in my brain.
I didn’t celebrate a Valentine’s Day again until I met my ex-husband at 18. Guess who was the one I first heard those three statements above from? Yep.
That man did not believe in celebrating Valentine’s Day. How disappointing for someone that loved the concept.
I tried to understand his perspective, but it disappointed me every time that we didn’t do anything to celebrate together. I had to move on with my disappointment quickly because his birthday was the day after Valentine’s Day, so the focus shifted to him. The last Valentine’s Day before we separated he had a realization that it didn’t matter as much how he felt about the day, and he should try to make it special since I enjoyed the day. It wasn’t enough to repair all the issues we had, not that this had anything to do with why we split.
I had one other relationship that overlapped Valentine’s Day between that one and now, but good golly, I’ve been able to block that one out so amazingly. I have zero memories of anything we may or may not have done to celebrate the day.
After my son was born, I continued on with the tradition my mom created for me. He loves his bear from his first Valentine’s Day more than any of his stuffies.
When this is published, we’ll be a week away from my first Valentine’s Day as a girlfriend in around eight years. My gifts for my partner are on standby. The gifts for our kiddos are purchased. I’ve been informed that I get to sit by and be adorable while secret Valentine’s Day surprises are in the works.
This brings me back to those three statements.
Sure, you could argue that the commercialization of Valentine’s Day adds so much pressure to a person. I’ve written about peer pressure, and holidays are some of the biggest reasons people feel pressure because they compare themselves to others.
No, you don’t need to celebrate Valentine’s Day simply because society told you so. If you don’t want to, then don’t. If you don’t have the money, don’t go into debt because of society pressure.
I’ll never be able to justify someone saying you shouldn’t only show someone love on Valentine’s Day. Who started that train of thought? In what world would Valentine’s Day be the only day someone shows love to the people they love? If you’re doing that, you definitely need to reevaluate your choices.
Christmas and Easter shouldn’t be the only days people acknowledge God/Jesus. For Americans, the Fourth of July likely isn’t the only day you feel patriotic. It’s the same concept. Having a commercialized day to celebrate love doesn’t negate your responsibility to show your partner love on the daily.
My grandpa wouldn’t dream of my grandma not having flowers sitting across from her to look at. My mom loved making our favorite food or taking us out for ice cream as a fun treat randomly. As my partner and I continue to grow our love for each other, we are taking active efforts to learn what each other need to feel appreciated and loved.
I’m constantly popping up with random things in my mailbox that made me think of my partner because I tend to show love by giving gifts. The reality is, that sweet man doesn’t really need surprises as much as he needs me to sit next to him and scroll through funny videos together or to be there to cheer him on while he catches another fish at the lake.
Basically, what this blog boils down to is, you need to do what works for you and the person you want to show love to.
If y’all truly don’t want to have anything to do with the commercialized aspect of the day, then that’s cool! Just make sure you or your partner aren’t just saying it to appease the other.
If you want to avoid the heart shaped, heart patterned, red, and pink extravagance that is Valentine’s Day, try something creative that works for you and your partner.
If you’re single, treat yo self!
If you’re a parent, surprise your kids in some way.
If a friend or group of friends is available, make it a fun friend day!
I asked on my socials for people to comment what they like to do for Valentine’s Day if they are trying to avoid the commercialization. A few people commented.
My sister-in-law and brother turn Valentine’s Day into a second Thanksgiving. They adore Thanksgiving and aren’t into the typical Valentine’s Day types of celebrations. So, how fun is it to bring back the foods that you generally don’t eat often, if at all, outside of on Thanksgiving.
One of my Texas friends mentioned really not enjoying gift holidays unless it involved her getting Lego’s. She’s literally the coolest person, and I love the idea of seeing her so happy after getting a cute Lego set.
A Kentucky friend suggested watching the stars with your partner. I’ve also loved the idea of getting a blanket and going somewhere peaceful and admiring the beauty of the night sky!
Here are a few other ideas that I think would be fun:
For couples:
- Go to the library or book store and you each pick out a book for the other person.
- Play card games/board games. They have ones specifically for couples that could be neat to check out.
- Research unique things about your city and see if there are any places you could explore and capture fun moments in pictures.
- Try a creative activity where you make something for each other. I enjoy the trend where couples try to paint the other. A pottery class would be neat. Trying out a new outlet that yall haven’t done before could be fun. I tried crocheting again the other day. That could be a unique challenge for most!
- Try a physical activity. I’ve been wanting to break out my roller blades for a minute. Roller blading/skating is a fun idea! I know a lot of places are still cold in February. So, maybe find a hotel with an indoor pool and go check that out!
For single people:
- Give yourself a budget and then go to your favorite store and buy only things you want.
- Go spend hours in your local library/ bookstore. No one is there to tell you they’re bored, so it’s perfect!
- Grab some friends and go to one of those paint/drinking places if your town has one. If it doesn’t, go grab some painting supplies, some drink choices, and make your own!
- Go to your local animal shelter and volunteer or check in on the animals. Maybe consider fostering animals!
- Take yourself to the movies. This used to make me so uncomfortable, but one year my church, in Texas, offered a parents night out, and I went to see a movie by myself, and I loved it. I didn’t have to share any snacks or take anyone to the bathroom. It was so nice. Give it a shot!
For the kids:
- Maybe consider having a “Yes Day” if you haven’t already designated another day for that. Kids tend to hear no a lot, so letting them feel a sense of freedom can be empowering for them. It can even just be a yes evening or yes hour. Whatever works for you and your family.
- Let your kiddos pick what to have for dinner and cook it if it’s developmentally appropriate! A family cooking activity can be lots of fun.
- Start a tradition of making a craft/activity related to the day. Maybe have everyone write down 5 things they love about themselves and their family members and spend a while sharing.
- Let the kiddos build a fort in the living room or another room large enough for everyone to have a sleepover in for the night. Spending quality time together is huge for children to feel loved, and it doesn’t cost a thing to hang out at home in close proximity!
- Make Valentine’s Day themed desserts. I don’t know any kid that doesn’t like making and eating sweets.
Just have fun!
Ignore the pressure and do what works for you! It doesn’t matter if you spend money or not. Continue to show your loved ones love all year, but don’t be scared to have a little fun by jumping in with the commercialization aspects sometimes. It’s totally okay to follow trends. You’re not lame because you bought a silly stuffed animal or enjoy heart shaped candy. It’s okay to enjoy the things that are over done in media and are gimmicky. If anyone judges you, they need to do some internal reflection and mind their business.
I hope y’all have an amazing Valentine’s Day regardless of what you do! Keep your eyes out for the next few LOVE blogs or go read them now if you’re reading this far into the future!
You are worthy of love. You are loved by so many even if you don’t realize it! Take care of yourself! Being a human is hard.
Ariel Pierce 