Bedtime Stories

Storytelling is in my bones.  My grandfather happened to be the king of telling compelling stories.  Everything he shared held so much heart.  He loved life and those who shared it with him.  I tend to be one who sits and listens rather than share stories with words.  My words linger in my brain until I put them down on paper and create the world once living within my brain. 

I have mentioned in a previous blog that I created a story with my son one night to bring him joy.  Go check out the blog, “The Cranky Lizard,” if you want to read more about that story.  I randomly started a nightly tradition of spending a little bit of cuddling time with my son, playing thumb wars, goofing off a bit, and creating stories together.

He hooked right on to the story creation idea and now asks me to tell him a story every night.  This generally means he’s cutting me off with ideas of his own and it becomes our story.  He even tells stories of his own.  I’m hopeful this is a long-time tradition. 

I’ve been writing the stories down in my phone to keep fun memories.  I thought it would be cute to share them with the world and have another safe place to keep them.   

None of them have titles.  Some of them are ones he created, some are ones I created, and some are both of our creations.  They’re super rudimentary, not focused on substance, and were solely meant to make my son and I laugh.   Most of them are also super short and may not make total sense but it’s about having fun!

Here we go! 

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Story 1: Story by Ariel

There once was a ghost named Spooky Ghost.  He always wanted to make friends and would try to say hi to people.  He realized people couldn’t see him.  He was so sad.  On Halloween he realized everyone could see him when they complimented his ghost costume.  He went around the rest of the night making friends and had a great time.  The end. 

Story 2: Story by Henry

There once was a black and white striped dragon.  He also had orange circles on his body.  His name is Breath Fire.  He lives in a dark cave that has clams inside with lights in them so the dragon can see in the dark.  The dragon found a crystal that gave him transformation powers.  The crystal was orange and pink.  He touched it and then he had magical powers to change into a person.  On Halloween he wore a dragon costume.  Everyone knew he was a dragon because he forgot to change his tail and wings.  Everyone ran away and he was sad.  Two adventurers named Henry and Mommy became friends with him.  He let them fly on his back.  The end.

Story 3: Story by Henry

Henry and Mommy lived in different houses.  Henry learned how to walk and would spend all his time with his mommy.  They would spend time in Henry’s room and had a lot of fun.  One night when they were sleeping a thief stole Henry.  Mommy punched the thief in the face and saved Henry.  The end. 

Story 4: Story by Ariel and Henry

There once was a horse named Larry.  He had three kids named Jerry, Mary, and Berry.  His wife’s name was Carey.  One day they went on a ferry.  They were on their way to visit their grandparents Terry and Gary.  At their grandparents’ house they learned about a secret fairy.  Her name was Bethany.  She lived in the attic of Terry and Gary’s farmhouse.  Bethany loved to sing.  She threw the best karaoke parties for all the fairies.  Terry and Gary could never catch Bethany as all the fairies would disappear when Terry and Gary would go to the attic.  One day Jerry, Mary, and Berry were playing in the attic when Bethany appeared.  It was quite a surprise.  She heard them singing and wanted to know who it was.  They all jumped in surprise.  They all became friends and eventually they met Bethany’s husband named Harry.  The end.

Story 5: Story by Henry

There once was a caveman named Jodo.  He was on a journey to see some new dinosaurs.  The end.

Story 6: Story by Henry

Once upon a time Charmander found a Squirtle who battled him in a challenge.  Charmander lost.  He cried and ran away.  He wanted to find a trainer with tough Pokémon.  He was in a cold area and none of the trainers liked Charmander.  He had a feather on his nose that made him sneeze.  Charmander found a trainer named Henry with tough Pokémon.  Charmander was so happy.  He battled Squirtle again and won.  He evolved into Charmeleon.  The end. 

Story 7: Story by Ariel and Henry

Once upon a time there was a Henry and Mommy.  Henry and Mommy were the best buddies ever.  One day Henry and Mommy went on an adventure.  They went to California and went to the beach.  While on the beach, they went searching for treasure under water.  Henry’s friends from town went along and their names were Athena, Christian, Isaiah, and Brantley.  While under water, they spotted a magical turtle that was carrying a treasure chest on his shell.  He was too fast due to his magical powers.  Henry, Mommy, and their friends didn’t know what to do.  Suddenly a lightning fish appeared.  It looked red and yellow like the flash.  The lightning fish told them they had to find a purple stone that would stop the turtle from being so fast.  They searched for hours and then Henry and Mommy found it.  They showed all their friends and then went to find the turtle.  Henry threw the stone at the turtle and stopped it in its tracks.  The treasure chest started to fall, and everyone swam to grab it.  They went up to the shore and realized they were lost.  They found an island with some turtles that could talk.  The turtles told them of the secret hole in a cave that could transport them to their homes.  They found the cave, made it home, and opened the treasure.  It was full of new and cool toys.  The end. 

Story 8: Story by Henry

One day there was a picnic at fairly land.  Henry, Athena, Christian, and Mommy wanted to see Kylo, a fairy.  They went in a teleporter and saw their friend Kylo.  They became fairies and had a picnic.  There was a chocolate fountain that used to be a water fountain.  You can dip whatever you want in.  They wanted marshmallows.  After the picnic, they slept over in a small tree.  They had a lot of fun when it was morning time.  They wanted to have a walk.  They saw magical pets.  They went into a magical pet store.  They all got pets.  Henry’s was a cat named pumpkin.  Athena’s was a dog named Delilah.  Christian got a parrot named Copier.  They wanted to play outside and had a water gun fight.  The end.   

Story 9: Story by Ariel

One day Otto the otter went out for a stroll.  While on his stroll, he met his friend Bob.  Bob was also an otter.  There were hundreds of Otters out for their Sunday stroll.  Every Sunday, all the otters in Otterville went out for strolls.  One Sunday, Otto went out on a bike ride.  All the other otters were staring at him.  He didn’t know what was happening.  They started yelling at him to get off his bike.  Otto forgot it was Sunday stroll day and not bicycle Monday.  Otto was upset.  He decided to become president so he could change the law.  He made every day be a bicycle or a stroll day.  All the otters thought he was so cool.  He decided to do other things as president.  He decided every day was taco day instead of just Tuesday.  He built a huge pool for all the otters to swim in whenever they didn’t want to go to the lake.  He also gave everyone a million dollars.  The end. 

Story 10: Story by Henry

Once upon a time a kid named Henry wanted a pet and his mom said yes.  He was so surprised when there was a dolphin as a pet.  He really wanted to order it, so he ordered it.  It was three dollars.  They bought it.  The dolphin and Henry were great friends.  They had a lot of fun.  They played in a pool and had lunch together.  Somebody was mad that they couldn’t get the dolphin as a pet.  They took the dolphin away.  Henry and Mommy drove to their house.  Henry saved the dolphin.  The end.

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Ten stories seemed like a good place to stop.  Yes, we’re a little goofy, but I bet you laughed at least once!  We’re still creating stories, so I anticipate there being more stories shared through my blog.  I want Henry to be able to read these cute memories one day.  Hopefully, he’ll have some sort of love for writing, reading, and storytelling. 

I hope you lovely humans are taking care of yourself!  Being a human is hard and you’re doing great!

Bullet Journaling – I’m back!

It’s me! Your local person who loves to do new things and then struggles to stick to them. Keep reading through a rollercoaster of emotions and eventually get to some bullet journaling content!

A few years back I bought a habit tracker that I found satisfying. It had a spot where you could list six different habits and there were little rectangle-ish spots to mark off if you completed each habit. I have an astronomically large collection of different colored pens. I chose the colors that sparked something in my heart and absolutely killed all my habits for the month of June 2021. Filling in the color wheel inspired me to try and continue. Something about a beautiful display of colors is motivating.

Unfortunately, the next month my heart experienced a bit of crushing due to a family visit that did not go how I expected but also exactly how I expected. The coloring off of each habit decreased significantly and ceased about two months after I started.

A little over a year later I found myself deep into my still present TikTok obsession. (I swear if the government gets rid of TikTok, I will lose it). I started following people who did bullet journaling and began a subsequent obsession. As I wrote in my past bullet journaling blogs, I found a motivation to start bullet journaling out of a desire to help one of my youth clients while working at Child Protective Services. I liked how the bullet journaling concept combined nicely with the habit tracker that I used a year before. My kiddo needed inspiration during a hard time, and I did as well. I figured it would be something we could work through together.

Unfortunately, again, crisis after crisis impacted my kiddo’s ability to keep working on her journal and my life fell apart around me as well. I won’t speak to my kiddo’s personal life, but I can speak to mine. 2022 led to huge changes at work and I lost people that were very important to me. I started to gain weight. I couldn’t control my eating. I threw myself into online dating to try and feel something and that crashed and burned with the complete disasters of people that I met.

Nothing seemed to help. Therapy. Medication. Writing. Reading. A Cruise. I felt empty.

I drafted pages and pages of different bullet journaling concepts. I tried to get back on track with this concept that had inspired me in the past. My therapist constantly encouraged me to bring back color in my life. I could see it in his eyes that he knew my eyes were missing their light, their color. He knew how much I loved to design the pages and do something semi artistic. I knew it as well, but nothing in me could get back to that colorful place.

In February of 2024, my life took a turn that I never expected. I made the decision to move from the place I’d been living for about eight or nine years and head back to my home state of Kentucky. I won’t go into the reason behind the decision in this blog as it’s not fully relevant to accomplish what I would like with my words. Anyways, in May of 2024, we were back in my hometown.

About four days before writing up this blog post, I felt inspired. I wanted color back in my life. Being home with my mom and realizing I hadn’t felt dread in months brought me a wave of joy. The inspiration may have also had a little to do with a Hallmark movie I watched with my mom the night before. The movie is called My Dreams of You. I won’t go into the whole concept but basically it followed a woman who dreamt of being a published author.

My mom hinted at the movie being a sign for me to start writing again. It had been months since I wrote anything with substance. Complaining in a journal, every once in a while, doesn’t give me the same energy as writing a blog, writing towards my novel, or writing something more creative. Something about the movie and my mom’s consistent encouragement of my dreams kicked me into gear. I grabbed a bullet journal and created a “writing” page within minutes.

I also picked out a book that happened to be in the same tote as the bullet journal. A “reading” page popped up just as quickly as its companion. The next day I started reading my book choice, wrote numerous journal pages, and created three additional bullet journal pages.

Now, here I sit, writing this blog, and guess what. My mom and another Hallmark movie inspire me. This movie is called Junebug. Guess what, again. The movie is also about an inspiring author. I’m starting to be a little creeped out by all the signs…

I told my mom I couldn’t go to bed without writing, because I wanted to color something besides red on my “writing” bullet journal page. I watched Junebug while starting to work on this blog and I’m still here long after it’s over.

There is no doubt in my mind that had I stayed in Texas, I would have stayed in the depths of my dread. I can’t picture when my life would have produced the joy I feel now. I don’t know that any color would have come back to my life. I know I have many things that I still need to work on, and it has only been a couple of days, but I’m hopeful. I still have a dream to be a published author, and I hope these small changes will be impactful in this journey.

This may not be what you thought you would read when seeing a title about bullet journaling. I dived straight into a deep pool of emotions. I appreciate y’all hanging in with me. I will now add comments about my experiences with bullet journaling compared to when I started in 2022 to add a less serious tone to this blog.

If you go to my blog post “Bullet Journaling – Post Two,” you will find a list of what pages I created in the past. I genuinely liked the concepts of the pages, but now I feel like it became too much for me and overwhelmed me. I do like the creativity in designing the pages but a few of them I had to do every month, and past Ariel could not find the energy to create new pages that often. Now, just because I couldn’t find the energy, doesn’t mean you can’t! I encourage anyone interested in bullet journaling to consider designing new pages as often as your heart desires.

I also decided instead of creating a page to write about my days in the bullet journaling, I would save that for my regular writing journals. My past water page also didn’t feel necessary because being home with my mom has made it easier to stay hydrated. I don’t feel like I need to track it because I’m not finding myself questioning the last time I drank water very often.

For all you lovely humans who struggle being kind to yourselves, I would recommend adding a bullet journal page, like I had previously, where you list something nice about yourself each day. While I loved doing this, eventually, it became repetitive, and I couldn’t come up with things that fit nicely in the little boxes I designated for this task. You may find yourself in this boat eventually as well, but I think it’s good to get yourself in a “kind to yourself” mindset for at least a month or two.

Currently, I am sticking to yearly pages. I want to be able to color in little boxes with the colors I’ve chosen and feel joy again. It’s also easier to stay motivated as I don’t have to create new pages very often. I think the five pages I have, at the moment, make the most sense for me. The pages are:

1. Writing
2. Reading
3. Emotions
4. Wake Up
5. Steps

I think the first two pages and the steps page are self-explanatory. The fourth page is helping me with waking up on time. I tend to hit snooze a million times and then end up cutting it close getting to work.

The third page is my favorite and I did it like this in the past as well. I created an emotions page to track how I feel about each day. In the past I used the colors and names of the five emotions from the movie Inside Out. Since I created this page, Inside Out 2 has released. In my current emotions page, I used the colors and names of all nine emotions from the new movie.

I would recommend heading over to my Instagram page to see all the pages! While you’re there, comment any suggestions for things I could possibly track with another yearly page!

Present Ariel is hopeful that no gut-wrenching event will happen to kick me out of my current state of happiness. I hope to complete these yearly pages in their entirety. I’m thinking I might post an end of month update each month on my Instagram to keep me accountable with y’all!

Thank you for reading to the end! Thank you for supporting my dreams when they’re actively being pursued and when they’re not. Life is hard. Being alive takes a lot some days, but I’m happy you’re here!

Here is a link to the habit tracker I used back in 2021. I bought it from Amazon. I really enjoyed it and highly recommend it if you’re not up for creating your own bullet journal pages and are trying to habit track.

https://a.co/d/2jkq8aK

I will also add a link to the bullet journals that I purchased that I like the most. The ones with rings make more sense to me when I’m trying to design the pages. I don’t have to worry about holding the cover or previous pages down. The price is also fairly reasonable for a three pack! I also bought these from Amazon.

https://a.co/d/5JMSqqJ

Happy Bullet Journaling, everyone!

30 Questions to Ask Your Partner, Part 2!

I’m bringing back a post idea from the past! I’m known for asking many questions and being the one to want to know everything about new people I meet. I’m also the one in a relationship that finds it fun to ask new things we may not know about each other.

I came up with 30 new questions to ask your partner. They’re weird and goofy and make you think in a perspective you may not generally.

I’ll post the questions and then go back and put my rationale for why I think they’re fun. Enjoy this silly post!

1. What is your favorite sound?

2. Which shoe do you put on first?

3. How do you make Mac and cheese?

4. Have you ever waved back at someone that wasn’t waving at you?

5. Would you ever go skydiving?

6. Do you have a least favorite school picture?

7. What is your favorite trinket?

8. What is your favorite Pokémon?

9. Do you prefer cats or dogs?

10. What is something strange you’re kind of obsessed with?

11. What is the weirdest food combination you’ve made and liked?

12. What is your go to dance move?

13. Do you have a favorite mug?

14. Do you prefer home made or store bought Christmas stockings?

15. What is one clothing item you have the most of?

16. Do you like having pictures taken of you?

17. Do you have a scar story?

18. What is your opinion on stuffed animals?

19. Who is the odd relative in your family?

20. How many blankets do you own?

21. What is your opinion on stickers?

22. Do you prefer cold or warm weather?

23. Do you prefer fake or real flowers?

24. What time do you normally go to sleep?

25. What’s something you would want named after you?

26. Do you ever turn off ceiling fans?

27. What is your favorite creative outlet?

28. Do you prefer hot or cool showers?

29. Do you peel a banana from the top or bottom?

30. What would you say is the coolest thing since sliced bread?

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Did any of these questions make you feel as if the answer to them would be the key to knowing if someone is your soulmate?

Probably not, but here’s a bit of feedback on them:

1. What is your favorite sound?

How random, right? I think of popping popcorn or my son’s laugh but my real favorite is going over the bumps they have on bridges. This is one to get your partner thinking.

2. Which shoe do you put on first?

Another one to make you think. Do we pay close enough attention to what we do on a daily basis? Probably not. I’m a left shoe first person.

3. How do you make Mac and cheese?

I mean… do you want to be with someone who doesn’t have the boxed directions memorized? Maybe your partner adds a unique ingredient. Maybe your partner is only a home made Mac and cheese person. It’s good information to know.

4. Have you ever waved back at someone that wasn’t waving at you?

Oh, so you don’t have an embarrassing moment like that one? Lucky. If not, what is an embarrassing moment you remember?

5. Would you ever go skydiving?

It’s a no go for me. I’d probably pass out and that wouldn’t be good. It’s good to know how adventurous of a partner you have because this may become a conflict for y’all in the future.

6. Do you have a least favorite school picture?

Something to make you think! Mine is when I had braces and a unique mouth insert thing. You can see the impressions of the mouth insert in the photo. It was also the year I cut my hair short for the first time. It’s not terrible but not my favorite.

7. What is your favorite trinket?

This one is hard for me. I have a bunch of random trinkets I love. A lot of these questions make you pay attention to yourself more. Mine is probably the Christmas giraffes I have where they are wearing scarves.

8. What is your favorite Pokémon?

If they’re not familiar with Pokémon they might be too young (or old) for you or are boring. Haha, kidding (sorta). Mine is either Togepi or Cubone.

9. Do you prefer cats or dogs?

This could really be a deal breaker for some. You have to think of what your home dynamics will be like. Maybe your animal hates other animals. It could be tough. I’m a cat person but also love dogs. I simply don’t have the time to give love to dogs like they deserve.

10. What is something strange you’re kind of obsessed with?

Mine is Pearl TikTok. I love watching random people open the clams and getting the pearls out. It’s so satisfying and I don’t know why. This question could potentially lead you to find a quirk about your partner you didn’t know.

11. What is the weirdest food combination you’ve made and liked?

Mine goes all the way back to high school. I was visiting my dad for the summer and was left to figure out my own lunch. I put together a salami and peanut butter sandwich. It’s actually quite delicious. This could also be one where you find something gross out about your partner.

12. What is your go to dance move?

I’m more of a head bobber and a little bit of hip shaking. I can’t dance, let’s just get right out and say it. Your partner may like to go dancing and your abilities may impact what activities you’re doing with each other.

13. Do you have a favorite mug?

Who doesn’t have a favorite mug? I’m not a big coffee drinker and don’t tend to use mugs but for some reason mugs are so cute. I have a square one that is Anger from Inside Out. It makes me smile every time I see it. Honestly, it’s in my fridge and holds my son’s cheese sticks.

14. Do you prefer home made or store bought Christmas stockings?

This could bring you into a whole discussion about Christmas. It’s an important topic because you may not have the same traditions and that could be a deal breaker for some. I enjoy getting the typical red and white stockings and then putting your name on in glitter. I haven’t done that in a few years though.

15. What is one clothing item you have the most of?

The pastor at my church shared his obsession with socks one day and I thought that was hilarious. I realized I have the same obsession. My socks and underwear drawer are definitely filled to the brim. This could be an important question to know how much space your partner may take up in a closet or dresser.

16. Do you like having pictures taken of you?

It annoys me when people say they don’t like having pictures taken. Why do you love ruining memories? Just take the picture and let your family enjoy having that record of you. Your children or grandchildren will likely love to see those pictures of you!

17. Do you have a scar story?

If you don’t, that’s pretty cool too! You must be much more coordinated than most. I have a beach story I like to tell.

18. What is your opinion on stuffed animals?

This could be a deal breaker. I definitely have a slight obsession with stuffed animals. I have more stuffed giraffes than most. Some have found that odd. That person wouldn’t be one that would work with me so that’s good to know.

19. Who is the odd relative in your family?

Let’s face it, we all have one random relative that we make a slight concerned facial expression when we talk about them. Maybe you’re the odd one out. Either way, it’s a good conversation starter.

20. How many blankets do you own?

Is your partner prepared for a random ice storm that knocks out power for days? Wait, is that only a problem for Texas people? Maybe not. So, it’s good to know if you’ll stay warm during an emergency. It’s also good to know if your partner has a blanket obsession.

21. What is your opinion on stickers?

Um, you don’t have a filing system of stickers in your home? Just me?

22. Do you prefer cold or warm weather?

This could be a deal breaker depending on where you want to set up shop for your family. I prefer a warmer location because snow stresses me out. It’s beautiful but it can make you feel a little trapped.

23. Do you prefer fake or real flowers?

This is good to know for surprise gifts for your partner. I don’t like receiving real flowers because it makes me sad that they’ll die in a few days. I love having fake flowers in my home because they’ll likely last forever and it’s fun to keep gifts your partner gives you.

24. What time do you normally go to sleep?

Do you like to cuddle before you go to sleep? This is a good answer to know so you know how your evenings will go together. It could be a deal breaker for someone whose love language is physical touch if you don’t go to bed at the same time. That’s not mine, so I’m not fully sure, but it seems logical.

25. What’s something you would want named after you?

I’ve always thought it was romantic when someone named a star after someone else. That’s so cute in my opinion. But what’s that random thing that it would be cool to see named after you? I think a flute brand would be dope.

26. Do you ever turn off ceiling fans?

Nope. Never. I really should probably clean those now that I think about it.

27. What is your favorite creative outlet?

Everyone needs an outlet to express themselves. Creativity is a good skill and I love to see it in my partners. I love to journal, write stories, paint, and do other miscellaneous craft projects.

28. Do you prefer hot or cool showers?

I like my skin scalding hot when I shower. I also think it’s cute to shower with your partner. It would be sad for a partner to like cooler showers.

29. Do you peel a banana from the top or bottom?

General curiosity. I’ve found peeling from the bottom much easier lately.

30. What would you say is the coolest thing since sliced bread?

I might have to come back to this question. I love my flute so that could be my answer but there’s probably something cooler that I’ll think of later.

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I hope this blog post got you thinking a bit about yourself. I hope it made you laugh. This can also be a fun list for when you’re hanging with friends.

When I was working on this list I asked a few coworkers for ideas. They went a little more wild with their ideas. It could be fun to add to this list and come up with your own conversation starters.

Thank you for reading this far! Let me know what questions you would add!

Updated Bucket List

If you were following along last year, you’ll know that I crossed three items off my bucket list!

18. Go on a cruise

I went on a cruise! How lucky am I? I went with two of my friends from work, one of their parents, and my son. We had a blast! I feel privileged to say I’ve crossed this item off. I didn’t think I would do so as soon as I did after making my first bucket list blog. Check out my blog post “Bucket List #18 and #35.”

35. Own a robot vacuum

I’m such a goof. I love this being on my list. This was definitely a tax return purchase. It isn’t one of the crazy expensive ones, but still a purchase I didn’t want to splurge on without extra money. I don’t use it as often as I’d like, but I’m still pleased with my purchase! Check out my blog post “Bucket List #18 and #35.”

39. Ride on a train

I accomplished this early on in January. The 14th to be exact. It didn’t go how I expected, but I crossed it off the list! Go check out my blog post “Bucket List #39.”

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There was an item that should have been on my list but I forgot until the moment it happened.

  1. Get on a jumbotron

My best friend invited me to a basketball game. I wore my favorite sparkle dress from Swan and Sparrow Boutique. I received numerous compliments on the outfit. Then my time to shine finally came. My best friend and I made it on the jumbotron! I tried to capture the moment with my phone, but I missed it.
I later found an app that searches for the jumbotron moments and was able to capture it and save the awesome memory. Thank you to my friend for helping me cross this item off my list.

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I partially accomplished a couple of items but I cannot fully cross them off the list.

  1. Walk on the side of a road when a car drives through a puddle and get splashed by it

I almost wrote a blog about this one because I was so excited about it, but I couldn’t get the wording right, and it started to seem silly. Anyways, my air conditioning busted in my car in 2023. I typically drive with my windows down now. One day after a rainstorm I had my windows down and drove towards work. Shortly after pulling off from a light, I got blasted with a wave of water on the driver’s side. How wonderful! I cracked up laughing. I loved it even though I was a little wet for work. I knew this was likely the most probable situation that my bucket list item would come true. I would likely see it coming any other time and I liked the surprise of this situation.

  1. Fill at least 100 journals with my thoughts

I started writing in one journal a month. I wrote in 11 of them and felt fairly accomplished towards this goal. I didn’t fill any of them up but I’m going to write in each again in 2024 and keep moving.

  1. Become fluent in Spanish

I bought Duolingo at the end of 2022 and spent all of 2023 practicing Spanish. I reached a 400-day streak recently and I’m planning to keep moving forward. I’m nowhere near fluent, but I’m still working on getting to a point to hopefully be a better resource for my clients.

  1. Have a picture with all eight of my siblings

I didn’t get a picture with all eight of my siblings but I did with three of my older siblings and that was a huge accomplishment. I would still love to have all of them together one day but we’ll see if that happens!

I also wanted to add a few more items to the list.

  1. Catch a foul ball or a home run ball at a baseball game
  2. Write a blog a week at least one year
  3. Be on a game show
  4. Indoor skydive
  5. See the aurora borealis

I’m up to 57 items on the list! I’ve crossed off four! 53 to go!

I’m not sure if I feel any differently about the bucket list this year. I have no plans to accomplish any of these items yet. I do feel that my motto for my life and my son, “Adventure Awaits,” is as important as ever. I wish I had more confidence that I would be able to complete more items more frequently. Unfortunately, the money aspect is an issue. Most of my items cost money. I’m working on saving money so I can plan more trips. A few of my friends helped with the items from last year, so I will probably start tag teaming some friends in to see what we can accomplish together.

I think I’m going to shoot for these items this year:

1. Pet a Giraffe

16. Go horseback riding

56. Indoor Skydive

There are lists on google with thousands of items on them. I wonder if having a huge list like that would be better or if keeping it smaller is the way to go? I guess a long list or a short list can be equally as unattainable. I can’t even begin to imagine a life event where I would meet any of the famous people on my bucket list. I think having dreams is a good thing but having a thousand items would get overwhelming for me. I’ll stick to my short list with a few likely unattainable items. To each their own.

This blog is short and basically just updating y’all. Nothing super interesting. Thank you for reading anyways! 

Remember, your dreams are important. Do whatever it is that makes you happy. Take risks but also don’t be afraid to stay in your comfort zone. Getting out of bed every day is hard enough. Don’t make having a bucket list drain you if you do not accomplish anything on it. Be proud of yourself for getting through each day! You’re loved and valuable regardless of what you do in life.

It’s 2024!

It’s once again the time everyone considers new year resolutions. It’s a time some use to start fresh on goals that maybe they did not accomplish the previous year. While in reality time doesn’t magically become any different, but the freshness the new year brings is kindly symbolic.

I know not everyone cares and there are enough memes out there about being the same person as the previous year, but I enjoy the concept of resolutions. You’re welcome to check out last year’s blog on the same topic. I achieved some halfway and completely ignored others. I didn’t accomplish any of my goals in their entirety, but I gave it the best shot I could.

2023 was as average of a year as some I’ve had. I kept the same job. My son and I celebrated our birthdays. My car had a few repairs needed as it seems to need every year. I continued to live in my lovely apartment. I gained a few unwanted pounds. I continued my journey to becoming a published author. Most importantly, I survived. I made it through each day even on the hard days. Luckily, there weren’t too many of those.

I did lose the one person in my life that felt like would always be there. My grandpa passed shortly before the new year. Something about him made one believe that he would be around forever. I loved my grandpa more than most. He had the best heart. My therapist once asked me who in my life I would consider loved me. The first thought in my head was my grandpa. He always showed up for me. When he ran his grocery store, he would always be there to teach me the ropes. He always encouraged my goals and said I could do anything. He always played with my brother and I and made us laugh. He taught us how to be creative and make unique items one wouldn’t see anywhere else. He taught us to love those around us. He always showed up on Valentine’s Day with a chocolate rose and told us he loved us. He was a constant in life and even as I got older and moved across the country, he still had a presence. I knew he was asking about me and checking in on how my life was going. He never had an attitude of “I told you so.” Regardless of what happened in life he would simply listen and then move on to what was next. He was the best storyteller. He had some of his favorites he would share consistently. He had some humorous ones and ones that were simply mesmerizing. He could draw in anyone who met him. He would always help those in need and never ask more from someone than what he knew they could give. I loved him so much and losing him is the one completely horrible part of 2023.

As we move into 2024, I hope to honor my grandpa with the life I live. I want him to know I’m continuing my dreams and hopefully write some things that he would be proud of.

In 2024 I have a few resolutions. Here is my list:

  1. Fill in journals with my thoughts.
  2. Continue writing my novel.
  3. Go to the gym at least once a week. (Gotta start small)
  4. Eat more vegetables.
  5. Support my son’s needs at school.
  6. Try to start up my book club again.
  7. Try to convince my mom to move to Texas.
  8. Drink the daily recommended amount of water.

Last year I was able to write in a journal every month at least a few pages, except for the month of December. I had a journal for each month, and I swapped them out on the first of each month. I hope to use the same journals and continue writing in them to hopefully fill all 12 up this year or at least in a few years.

I continued to refine some of the pages I’ve already completed towards my novel last year. This year, I hope to write more original content and add it to the work already done. I would love to get a rough draft completed, but we shall see.

I was fairly consistent for a good half of the year towards my gym goals last year. I slacked off towards the end of the year and want to get back into the habit of gym attendance. Even if it’s just walking on a treadmill for an hour, that’s more than I was accomplishing towards the end of last year.

I honestly couldn’t tell you a time I truly ate many vegetables last year. I felt accomplished when I would add lettuce and tomatoes to a chicken sandwich at a drive thru. Who are we kidding though, I would almost always pull of the tomatoes when the texture would get to me and a few lettuce strips a year isn’t going to cut it. I truly need to work on my eating habits and hope to add more veggies to my meals in 2024.

My son struggled with kindergarten in 2023. He was new to school and hasn’t adjusted well. I’m hoping to get some services set up for him in the new year and ensure he has what he needs to be successful.

Last year I fell flat on my book club goals. I couldn’t find the umph I needed to post as much as I wanted and reading the books would sometimes be me shoving them in the night before we were supposed to meet. I want to consider doing one book every two months to see if that takes off some of the pressure. I hope my friends are still interested in joining me!

My mom has been caring for my grandpa for a number of years. Since he passed, she may consider moving. I have always wanted to live with my mom again, but she loves living in her current home. I don’t know that she would want to stay without my grandpa so I’m trying to convince her to live with me. Texas is lonely without my mom and having her around would be so peaceful and enjoyable. I hope she’ll consider it!

I LOVE water. Aside from milk and juice every once in a while, I only drink water. I know water is good for your health. I want to stay hydrated and reap the benefits of having enough water in my body.

Just as I said last year, even if you set resolutions and don’t accomplish them, you’re still amazing. It’s always worth trying to accomplish your goals but you’re not any less worthy if you don’t in the timeline you hoped, or even if they’re never reached.

I also plan to reach more goals toward my blog and website. I would love to get updated photos and make the site a little more refined. I would like to post more blogs in general to keep a consistent flow of words out to my readers. I would love to know if there are any topics y’all would be interested in reading about. Feel free to comment, email, or reach out to me on my Instagram.

The ideal situation would be to write a blog a week, but I think I’ll likely accomplish at least one a month. That’s what I’m shooting for. I appreciate those that continue to support me, especially my mom. Thank you for reading my blogs. I hope to interact more with y’all in 2024!

Tucker’s Grocery

To the man that taught me what love feels like. To the man that would give the shirt off his back to those that need it. To the man that served the communities he belonged to for his entire life. To the man who helped build a beautiful family with many generations still growing. There will never be anyone like you on this earth. I hope this short story in honor of you will be a small token of the love I have for you. Thank you for being the best grandpa!

This story is inspired by the grocery store my grandfather owned for all of my childhood and one of my favorite stories my grandfather would tell us.

—–

   For about 20 miles Derek drove past nothing but cows, trees, and the most beautiful grass you will find in the entire country. He traveled to visit his aunt and uncle who lived in a small town in Kentucky. When he received directions, he learned the saying “if you blink you will miss it.” The churches he passed were as plentiful as the farms. It appeared to Derek that southern people really like beef and Jesus. 
   Derek still had a good 45 minute drive before he reached his aunt and uncle’s home when he drove up on what appeared to be a diamond in the rough. A small white sign with black letters read “Tucker’s Grocery” on the front of a two story building. Derek usually tried to make trips to see his family without stopping but the urge to use the restroom and grab a snack made this place seem irresistible. 
   He pulled into a large gravel parking lot and parked next to, what had to be, every Dodge truck that existed. Derek mentally added another item to the list of things Southern people like. Dark gray horizontal wood lined the building, similar to that of a log cabin.  A cork board, larger than the one window on the front of the first floor, held random signs and business cards. A charity auction flyer, a local tire shop business card, and a few carvings that said things like “James and Samantha 4-ever” and “Jody wuz here,” were the stars of the board. 
   It did not take Derek long to realize the grocery store only occupied the first floor of the two story building. Based on the floral curtains on the top floor’s one window, he figured the upstairs must be where the owner lived. Derek walked around in this small country store and awed at how many things could be shoved into one space. The list included a deli selection, an aisle of basic grocery needs, a fridge and frozen food section, a room in the back that held three spinning shelves of movies, dog and cat food, shelves of sodas, buckets of nails and screws, and this store also happened to be the local post office drop off. Derek used the entirely too small bathroom, grabbed a Ski from the fridge, a package of powdered donuts, and a turkey sandwich before deciding to sit for a few minutes at the small seating area. 
   The older man sitting in the only chair not physically attached to the tables gave off the energy of a store owner. Derek quickly learned his name to be Keith and became internally disappointed that no one here was named Tucker. Derek also made the observation that no women were in the store. Every seat at the 12 seater table held a body, except for one, which Derek sat in. Keith started a new story as Derek removed the Saran Wrap that clung perfectly around his turkey sandwich. The story was about growing up in the West. 
   “Growin’ up out west was so nice. Ya never had to worry about not having a job,” Keith started with a calm demeanor. The other 11 men seemed to grunt and nod along like Keith was a god and only his words mattered in this store. Keith continued with a shocking statement of: “We always had a job digging the Grand Canyon.” 
   No one said anything and, like robots, continued to nod along. Derek cleared his throat, and whether he was a god or not, decided to correct Keith. “Wasn’t the Grand Canyon a natural phenomenon?” 
   All 11 heads turned to Derek as Keith said smoothly, “That is what we want people from the East to think so they’ll come spend their money.” 
   Derek considered this statement for a moment and then, with a smirk, asked, “Well, what’d they do with all the dirt and rocks?” 
   Keith didn’t skip a beat and immediately asked, “Have you ever heard of the Rocky Mountains?” 
   Derek turned to his sandwich which, at this point, he had only taken one bite of and began to focus fully on the task of eating so he could get back on the road as quickly as possible.  The other 11 men did not seem bothered by this conversation at all. They all began to share random stories, eat their food, and there were even a few card games that had started. 
   At this store, you paid for whatever you ate after you ate it. Keith ran this store alone and was the one behind the cash register when Derek headed out to leave. Derek had never seen a man with such mischievous eyes. Although mischievous, he radiated kindness and even stated Derek could take a drink to go on him if he wanted. Unsure why, Derek felt he would listen to anything this man said, so he took an extra Ski, considering you can only get them in a few places in the country anyways. 
   Now back in his car, Derek moved to put his seat belt on as he thought about Keith’s strange story. Derek felt 99.9% positive that Keith had made the story up as a joke but the story was told with such confidence it made Derek doubt himself. Derek got back on the road to his aunt and uncle’s home and had a feeling he would always remember Tucker’s Grocery and its interesting owner.

Thankfulish

At church this past weekend, the pastor spoke about being grateful.  He spoke about “thanksgiving” and the Bible verse from Psalm 100:4.  Basically, the lesson is to be grateful and you’ll be closer to God and feel happier in your life in general. 

Since Thanksgiving is tomorrow, I thought it would be fun to create as long of a list as I can come up with of things I’m grateful for at this moment in my life.  I also wanted to use it as an opportunity for those who need an idea for your turn in the “what are you thankful for” part of Thanksgiving dinner. 

These are in no particular order, simply what came to my head in a random moment over the last few days.  My son, God, family, and friends will always top my list so they’re not included here. These are the random other thoughts of my head.  

  • Grape Uncrustables
  • Thumbs
  • Stuffed animals
  • Swimming
  • The smell of popcorn 
  • Leggings 
  • Trashcans 
  • Books 
  • The movie Elemental 
  • Trains (Check out my “Bucket List #39” Blog)
  • Journals
  • Paint 
  • The smell of grass
  • Shoes 
  • Texting 
  • Pushpins 
  • Movie theaters 
  • Recliners 
  • Stitch
  • Giraffes
  • Markers
  • Cups with snarky messaging 
  • Vacuums (Check out my “Bucket List #18 and #35” Blog)
  • Hoodies 
  • Cats
  • Greeting cards
  • Swings 
  • Flutes 
  • Blankets 
  • Blueberry Pancake scented candles 
  • Glasses 
  • Baby wipes 
  • 212 – if you know, you know.
  • Board games 
  • Backpacks 
  • Pencils 
  • Language learning apps
  • Sand
  • Picture frames 
  • Stickers 
  • Fitbits 
  • Card games 
  • Tape 
  • Wrapping paper videos 
  • Tiaras
  • Socks 
  • Tiktok
  • Bananas 
  • Michael B. Jordan (Check out my “Michael B. Jordan” Blog)
  • Potatoes and their versatility 
  • Disney 
  • Lanyards
  • Washers/Dryers
  • Soap
  • Christmas trees
  • Sticky notes 
  • Music
  • Sunflowers and their seeds 
  • Computers 
  • Apartments 
  • Smiling 
  • Hammerhead sharks 
  • Blogging
  • Pokemon
  • Tiny versions of big things 
  • Puzzles
  • Video games 
  • Zip up jackets 
  • Knick knacks 
  • Holiday decor 
  • The patience song (Check out my “10 Songs for Mental Health Support” Blog)
  • Cameras
  • Book to movie adaptations 
  • Buckets 
  • Naps 
  • Birthdays 
  • Random themed parties 
  • Hawaiian bread 
  • Phones 
  • Dinosaurs

If you spent your time reading my silly list, thank you.  I’m grateful for all those who have viewed my website and blog since I created it almost two years ago.  

Truly, there is something about focusing on all the positives in life, even if they’re silly little minute things when you’re looking at life as a whole.  Life is overwhelming.  There’s so much bad.  It never gets any easier, but we can try to shift our focus.  Be grateful for all you have, and hopefully all you don’t won’t seem as noticeable.  

I spent about an hour coming up with this list, and I couldn’t stop smiling.  I wanted to find as many random things as I could to hit a laugh in someone’s day.  I hope you’re smiling.  I hope your holiday (if you celebrate) is amazing.  If you don’t celebrate, I hope you take time to be thankful anyways!  I love you all! 

His Plans

How did a church sermon inspire a blog about being ghosted and relationships in general?  

I just plugged in my Ipod and Kelly Clarkson’s song What Doesn’t Kill You (Stronger) came on and now I’m even more ready to explain so many things.  

Scoffing is the general reaction to people saying things like “God spoke to me,” or “I heard God so clearly.”  I don’t get it.  I’m constantly begging to hear something.  Literally words.  I would love to have God appear and be like “DO THIS, DUMMY.”  I assume God wouldn’t call me a dummy but I need instructions like those yellow dummy instruction manuals I recall from childhood.  

Recently, I’ve been feeling the words “God has plans for me,” playing over and over in my head.  I went to church the last two weeks and both the main pastor and a guest pastor said those exact words.  I often feel like the message is meant for me but even more so these last two weeks.  

I’ve been hating everything and everyone (probably not everyone but I’m being dramatic for entertainment purposes).  My job brings me loads of anxiety.  Being a single parent drains my energy battery consistently.  Being single in general makes me feel some type of way and my therapist is probably tired of hearing about it. 

A couple of weeks ago I met a cutie patootie on the dating app I’ve been using.  He seemed nice, was great at banter, and I appreciated the ease of being around him.  He asked me to be his girlfriend fairly quickly after spending time together.  After a fun and honestly lovely week, I never saw him again.  He kept talking to me for a bit, but then *poof.*  He was gone and I’ve never been more confused.  

Did I come on here to complain about being ghosted?  Am I writing this with the hopes of him reading it and knowing how uncool it is to ghost someone?  Probably a bit of both.  However, it’s more than that.  

I’m writing this blog because I love to write.  This topic is something that is on my mind and I felt motivated to write about it.  This brings me back to the words playing in my head.  God has plans for me.  I’ve dreamt of being a published author and writing, regardless of what it’s about, brings me closer to my dreams.  

I’ve felt that writing is part of God’s plan for me.  After hearing the message at church this past Sunday, the first thing that came to my mind is that I need to write.  Everything in me screamed that this is something I needed to do.  I started with my journal and began complaining to it about being single and then this blog came to my mind.  

The pastor stated “We will never complete anything if our intentions are without actions.”  Oof.  I’ve been ignoring my computer.  I’ve been ignoring my journals.  I’ve been binge watching tv shows and scrolling TikTok to pass the time instead of doing things that will bring me closer to my dreams.  How can I continue to pray to God about being clear when I’m not listening.  I’m blocking him out with Sister, Sister reruns or anything else I can use to drown my depressing thoughts.

I’m a writer.  I’m going to be a published author.  This blog is every bit about motivating my dreams as it is about relationships.  Now, my mom helped with a little inspiration behind this blog.  She suggested I write down a list of what I’m looking for in a potential partner and pray on finding someone that meets the list.  

My immediate reaction is to complain.  I told her I’ve tried that before and God didn’t listen.  I said what I say over and over that I can’t hear God and don’t think he listens to me.  I remembered while writing this blog that I found a journal a few weeks back with a list exactly like the one she suggested.  I wrote it back in September of 2019.  

Honestly, it’s a fairly superficial list.  I’ll share the picture on my Instagram so you can see the official list but I’ll list what it says here: 

“In no Particular Order…

Loves Disney
Has ambition/dreams
Is at least my height/taller
No more than 7 years older than me
No more than 3 years younger than me
Is fit/healthy 
Has a job
Lives alone or has no issues with moving 
Wants to travel
Loves giraffes
Has a degree or is working on getting one
Can discuss politics/religion/race without getting angry
Loves to read/wants a library in future home
Has good teeth
Doesn’t drink or smoke
Follows basic traffic/driving laws 
Doesn’t need to be told to help around the house
No sex before marriage”

I share this part of myself to speak on what it’s like being single and exploring relationships.  I’m literally asking for someone to simply not hate on the fact that I have a large giraffe collection and stop at stop signs.  It’s not that difficult.  

In all seriousness, we should be more thoughtful about our potential partners.  Are they kind to strangers?  Do they interact with children with ease and no creepiness?  Do they have a sense of humor?  There are so many more things than my simple list from 2019.  I didn’t write anything else in the journal after I made this list and don’t believe I looked back at it until I stumbled across it a few weeks ago.  I obviously didn’t take it too seriously and know that I never prayed about it like my mother suggested.

I complain about being single often.  It’s such a weird place to be when you’re in your 30’s and feel like you’re missing out on something.  I’ve always thought that I make a great partner.  I’ve always wanted to make someone laugh and cheer them on in all their dreams.  

Relationships are the same as my dreams.  God has a plan for me.  I don’t know what that plan is and I still would love for Him to come scream it in my face but I’m finding the path to patience, even if it’s filled with many complaints to my therapist.  

Church has been huge for me.  I’ve felt a lot closer to God than when I’m out here in the wilderness wild ’n out with no assistance.  Writing is also huge for me.  When I write, I feel such a freedom I can’t explain.  I feel like I’m truly doing God’s calling.  

So, even though I am salty about being ghosted, I’m still out here with hope about God’s plan.  I’m curious what everyone else’s future partner lists look like.  I feel like lately I’ve been using math.  

The humor of my college best friend +
The height of my baby daddy+
The accent of an ex+
The faith of a college friend+
The ambition of this recent ghoster+

I don’t know what kind of person those things would equal but it’s hard not to compare people to the people you’ve met and possibly dated in the past.  I have no idea what my future partner’s total being will be but I’m excited to find out.  

I’m thankful for this opportunity to write about my life and share a little of my goofiness with the world.  I’m thankful to my church for inspiring me to put actions along with my prayers.  I plan to continue building my relationship with God and hope to better understand His plans for me!   Thank you for coming along this journey with me!

Bucket List #18 and #35 

If you haven’t read my bucket list blog, please head here: https://authorarielpierce.com/2023/01/03/a-30-year-olds-bucket-list/ 

I considered writing an individual blog for each item but decided against it. I thoroughly thought through a well-constructed blog about how owning a robot vacuum changed my life.  

It did for about a week and then it became, like many things I own, a reminder that my mental health is questionable.  

Bucket List item number 35 is to “Own a robot vacuum.”  

I own a robot vacuum! I honestly bought it months ago, shortly after I published the original bucket list blog. However, writing became a thing I couldn’t do for pleasure for a bit. The last blog I published was my mom’s birthday blog in February. We’re creeping up on four months of zero writing… Ouch. I don’t think I realized things were that bad until writing that sentence.  

However, I sought out a psychiatrist, per my therapist’s recommendation, and things have been improving! Maybe I’ll write about that experience in a later blog post.  

Any who.  

I own a robot vacuum! I love it, and here’s the link if you want to love it too: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B079QYYGF1/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_image_o02_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

It does the job. However, prior to it being able to do it’s job, my floor must be free of hazards. It will bump around bigger, heavier items. It will suck up most of the smaller mess, but it will not do well with all the toys, clutter, and miscellaneous items I have all over the place. It will run, but it will suck up your socks and get stranded on a small item that’s too big to get sucked into it.  

Basically, I need to clean my apartment before I run my vacuum. So, the vacuum is great, but I haven’t had the mental gusto to be able to keep my apartment clean enough to run it on the regular. I’ve already posted a blog on how mental health connects to cleanliness, so I won’t go much further into this concept. Here is that blog if you would like to check it out: https://authorarielpierce.com/2022/09/19/to-clean-or-not-to-clean/ 

The most exciting part is that I checked off a second item on my bucket list!

———-

A surprising turn of events is that I checked off a fairly big item on my bucket list since my last blog post as well.  

Bucket List item number 18 is to “Go on a cruise.” 

The tickets have been purchased since February, ya know, one of those tax refund splurge purchases!  

I didn’t want to spill the beans on this one until I for sure went on the cruise. From May 22, 2023 until May 26, 2023 (technically until about 9 AM on May 27th), I was on a cruise!  

I don’t know if it was the fresh Mexico air or five days avoiding any work obligations, but I felt motivated to write about my second and third bucket list items!  

This third item is now crossed off the list thanks to the help of my lovely friend who also led me to cross the first item off the list. She and her family were planning to go on this cruise, and she invited me to join. I couldn’t pass up this opportunity. I didn’t have any major obligations and felt a vacation would be a change of pace.  

I don’t really feel going into details of the trip are important as there was nothing monumental about this trip like the lesson I learned on the train. I had fun, got to spend time with two of my friends, kissed a hot stranger, and my brain finally felt a freedom it had been lacking for years.  

I guess I can say, take the vacation. Do something that requires no obligation to anyone but yourself. If you have children, take them with you if you want, but make sure to find moments for yourself. We all deserve breaks. We deserve moments of goofing off, of meeting new people and sharing a laugh, of leaving our work obligations behind for a bit. If you can’t do that, I don’t know what it is you do but it makes my heart hurt a bit for you.  

Here are a few photos I enjoy. I’m keeping most to myself, but the water was so peaceful and who doesn’t love a good towel art animal.  

Here’s to checking off a third bucket list item!  

Best Mom in the World

I told my mother a lot as a child “You’re the best mom in the entire world.”  Her response would often be, “I’m your only mom.” 

While that may be true, she said it because she didn’t believe MY statement to be true.  

So, I would say, “well, I don’t know if you’re the best mom in the world, but you’re the best mom for me.” 

I inherently changed my original statement because my mother doubted herself.  

Let me spend some time telling you, and my mother, why she is the best mother in the entire world. 

  1. My mom taught me how to dream.  I dreamt of playing the flute.  She was there as I cried because I couldn’t figure out how to play Mary had a Little Lamb.  She was there when I played my first solo in a concert.  She encouraged me to keep playing as long as I desired.  I dreamt of being a doctor.  She told me I could do anything.  She encouraged my brain and helped me believe I was smart enough.  I dreamt of being a writer.  She encouraged me to go back to school when everyone else told me it was a waste of time.  She reads all my blogs and tells me what she thinks of them.  She listens as I propose new ideas.  She listens as I read a chapter of my novel to her.  She tells me she can’t wait to read from my published book one day.  I dreamt of changing the world.  She introduced me to Faith Hill’s song “Wild One.”  
  1. My mother taught me to love God.  I remember being in my freshman “Christian Beliefs” class in college.  I’m fairly certain that was the name of the class… Anyways, one of the assignments was to write a paper about our beliefs.  The only part of the paper I recall being in one of the longest papers I’ve ever written is, “I believe in God because my mother exists.  How could someone so wonderful come from anything but a loving and caring God?”  I witnessed my mother struggle with her relationship with religion and God and learned that this is okay.  We’re meant to question.  We’re meant to wonder.  We’re not meant to follow blindly and not have struggles.  Our relationships with God are our own and we have to build them up in whatever way works for ourselves.  I loved seeing her Bible on the coffee tables of my childhood homes.  I loved seeing her face look so studious as she took time to soak in the words.  I loved singing songs with her as we listened to K-Love radio station in the car.  I loved seeing her happy in the moments when she felt loved by someone who loves us unconditionally.  
  1. My mother taught me to protect myself (and possibly be a little paranoid but it’s okay).  She appeared in my ear on a field trip in 8th grade.  I traveled with my school band but have no memories as to where we were going.  We stopped at a mall to eat and have a bit of free time.  My best friend and I were goofing off in a photobooth when a pair of feet appeared towards the bottom of the curtain.  The person attached stated, “can I join you?”  When we didn’t respond, he opened the curtain and repeated his question.  My friend froze and I immediately responded with “no thank you.”  He did not leave and I pushed my frozen friend out of the booth to get away.  He continued to follow us and I knew we needed to get around more adults.  I directed my friend to the nearest store where we stood by the checkout until we saw a larger group of friends that seemed to scare off the creep.  Without my mom encouraging me to learn how to protect myself, I’m not sure I would have known what to do.  She never wanted me to have to rely on anyone else for my protection.  She encouraged my grandfather’s lessons on what to do in certain situations if all you had was your hands, a knife, or other random objects.  I also appreciated the statements, “don’t talk to strangers,” “always check your backseat before getting in a car,” and “let me know when you get there.”  She also protected me from gum, gatorade, and ramen noodles.  Probably a number of other foods as well.  I couldn’t tell you the research but there’s possibly something sketchy in those items.
  1. My mom taught me about adventure.  It was generally just me, my mom, and my brother growing up.  Everything we did together held adventure material.  Trying to out race a storm to get home safe?  Adventure.  Traveling somewhere and ending up lost?  Adventure.  Going to the grocery store?  Adventure.  Semi homeless for a bit?  Adventure.  This likely holds a little bit of number three as well.  She wanted us to feel protected and know that even though things might not be totally okay, we were a team and would figure out how to get through it together. 
  1. My mom taught me about money.  We didn’t always have it.  There were days when I knew my mom struggled.  There were days when our home wasn’t always our home.  Yet, I never felt I lacked anything.  My childhood was filled to the brim with everything I needed.  I learned to value people over money.  I learned that no matter how much money you have, you are worthy of having everything.  I learned that no matter how little you have, you can still help others.  I learned that a child should never feel bad about the financial status of their parents.  My mother never made us feel bad about wanting things.  She never made us feel bad for asking for things she couldn’t give us.  She simply explained it wasn’t in the budget and she would try another day.  She worked so hard even though she shouldn’t have had to.  The world isn’t kind, but she did her best to give us the best life.
  1. My mom taught me how to love others.  One of the most important lessons my mom taught me growing up encouraged me to put more thought into my actions than the actions of others.  She taught me that some people didn’t know how to be kind or were too hurt to care.  She taught me that people deserved love even if they could not give it.  She taught me to give to others without expecting anything in return and if I couldn’t do that then don’t give.  She taught me to give to others without a thought as to what they do with your gift.  It didn’t matter what they did with it.  If you feel compelled to help another person, then you better do it.  
  1. My mom taught me about selflessness.  I never heard an ill word about my father growing up.  I never knew about the struggles she felt about sending my brother and I to our father’s home for visits.  As an adult, she tells me, “I wanted you to build your own opinion of your father and not be impacted by my feelings.”  Despite being hurt by my father’s actions, she did not insert her feelings into our relationships with our father.  As a parent now, I am attempting this same method with my son’s father.  I’ve never known the level of selflessness she held until attempting to do what she did.  She truly exemplifies what it means to put your children first.  
  1. My mom taught me how to listen.  She listened to my flute playing.  She listened when I complained about someone from school.  She listened to my loud singing as she tried to watch tv.  She listened to all the different dreams I shared with her.  She listened when I changed my mind despite creating a bit of an inconvenience for her.  She listened to who I cared about and cared about them too.  She listened to who I cared less about and still cared about them too.  She listened to my stories without interruption.  She listened as I shared who I loved and loved them too.  She listened as I shared things I did wrong.  She listened as I shared things I did right.  She listens as I complain about the world even though she may not always agree.  She listens as I doubt my ability to be a mother.  She listens as I tell her I likely won’t ever move home.  We argue and sometimes hang up the phone on each other but I know I could call her back in a few minutes and she would still listen.  She tries her best to hear my perspective and has always encouraged me to consider the perspective of others.  
  1. My mother taught me how to be silly.  I have so many memories of laughing with my mom.  I loved hearing her attempt to wake me up by calling me silly nicknames that I’m not even sure how to spell here.  I loved her singing the patience song at us to make us laugh when we were being impatient and then being a good sport when we started singing it back to her as we got older.  I loved hearing her laugh when we would tell her stories.  I loved when she would happily oblige creating a snake out of the paper straw wrappers every time we went to a restaurant.  I love hearing her giggle with my son even though he’s in that phase of not knowing his jokes don’t make any sense. 
  1. My mother taught me to love myself.  When your mother believes in your dreams, you believe in your dreams.  When your mother tells you you’re beautiful, you believe you’re beautiful.  When your mother tells you you’re talented, you believe you’re talented.  The world often tried to tell me my dreams were crazy, I didn’t fit the beauty standard, and I’m not as talented as I think.  My mother always disputed those thoughts that tried to take over my brain.  I didn’t always believe her and I’m still working on it.  Having your biggest fan in your corner really helps your self esteem.  My mom taught me that no matter what anyone says, I’m not lacking anything.  My mom taught me that no matter what anyone says, I’m not too much.  My mom taught me that as long as I’m happy with myself, it won’t matter what anyone thinks of me.  She taught me to embrace my giraffes.  That may be a weird statement but a number of partners I’ve had often told me my giraffe collection was childish.  She told me not to change and one day someone will love me as I am and will celebrate me, giraffes included.  I dress as I want because my mom allowed me the freedom to do so.  I write these words because my mom reminded me my thoughts are important.  I love myself because she first loved me.  

Mom, thank you for recognizing early that I’m a wild one.  Thank you for letting me be me even when it seemed questionable.  Thank you for loving me, especially on days I don’t remember to love myself.  Thank you for teaching me so many wonderful things even though I doubt you had any idea you were teaching me so much. 

Mom, I may not be in a place to afford a trip to see you.  I may not be able to send you a physical gift.  I may not even know what gift you would want (outside of a visit from me).  However, I love writing because of you.  I love creating because you helped me learn to create.  You gave me so much hope for the future.  You gave me so much love that I couldn’t possibly ever give back to you.  

Mom, I give you the gift of my words.  My heart is in these words and I hope you know that no matter where I am, I am always with you.  I couldn’t possibly exist without all you did for me and continue to do.  You’re my conscience.  I love others because you first loved me.  I love you, mom. 

Happy Birthday!