2022 doesn’t bring any horrific memories to mind.
I celebrated my son’s fourth birthday with his TT. I celebrated my 30th birthday with my mom and her best friend. I continued my book club I created in 2021. I traveled to another state for the first time on my own to celebrate my cousin’s wedding. I saw one of my sisters for the first time in around 10 years. I created a website, published 27 blogs, and created an Instagram page, all to support my writing dreams.
Despite all the good, I sure continued to be dramatic as hell in my therapy sessions.
Anyways…
The first day of a new year often brings about thoughts of starting fresh, creating resolutions, and thinking about one’s past in hopes of seeing a better future.
I have numerous “resolutions” for 2023. Call them whatever you want. Resolutions. Goals. Aspirations. Dreams. I know some people don’t like the concept of resolutions, but I think it’s a generally chill concept.
There’s a few categories for my resolutions. Here’s a rundown:
- Reading Writing Resolutions
a. Read 12 books with Adventure Awaits Book Club
b. Finish Creative Writing/English degree
c. Research publishing options for my children’s book
d. Complete rough draft of GTS
e. Fill a journal each month with writing - Physical Health Resolutions
a. Go to the gym every day there isn’t a legitimate conflict
b. Eat more veggies
c. Drink the daily recommended amount of water every day - Mental Health Resolutions
a. Be more productive in therapy
b. Write when I feel my brain telling me I should snack
c. Spend more time with friends
I may not accomplish all I set out to do in 2023. Life has a way of getting in the way of your plans. However, I want to comment on little things.
I had similar resolutions for 2022. One little thing I’m proud of is a bit odd. I was legally married from 2011 until 2015. During that marriage we bought a pan. My husband taught me how to make a delicious chicken recipe in that pan. Overall, I have happy memories of the pan. I became very attached to this pan. I kept the pan in the divorce. I got into a physical altercation with a later boyfriend who tried to keep the lid to this pan when we broke up. I’ve cooked about every stove top meal in this pan since I bought it.
I frequently had to tighten the screw to the handle on this pan. Every now and then I would find black flakes from the pan in my food. It had many scratches. The pan lived a much longer life than it should have.
One thing not on my 2022 resolution list was to get rid of this pan.
In August of 2022, I bought a new pan. I let go of the old one.
This was such a little thing that felt huge.
I realized that replacing this pan was so huge because I was releasing the Ariel I imagined I would be when I was 19 and got married. I have been hating myself for so long because my life is not what I pictured it would be. I realized that I deserve to let go of the anger I have held for so long about my failed marriage. I realized that I learned so much from that marriage and manifested those feelings into the pan. I’ve created so many meals in this pan that past Ariel would be proud of. I’ve created a life that past Ariel should be proud of. I deserve to be proud of the life I have even though it’s not what I thought it would be.
I created this blog post to say, replace the pan.
Find the little things in your life that you don’t think will have a huge impact but might looking back on them.
Be proud of yourself and the life you’re living. You deserve to be happy even if your life isn’t what your past self imagined for your future.
Don’t be afraid of resolutions. Create an absurdly long list and still be happy if you accomplish nothing on it. Your worth is not determined by what you do. You’re worthy simply because you exist.
PS: I’ll get a picture posted on my Instagram of the pan if you’d like to see it!
Ariel Pierce 